Wild Cow Solution

My oldest son, who is brilliant (which is how I describe all my children), was talking to my mother one night before bed, about camping. He was asking her if she could come with us on our camping trip. She said she’d have to see. Then he asked if she could buy him a shotgun. She asked, “Why do you need a shotgun?” Good question, I thought. “Because we might need to shoot some reindeer for food.” All deer are reindeer to my son. So my mother said some other stuff and then after some time went by he asked, “Where does steak come from?” “Cows,” was her reply. He thought about this, then said, “We might have to shoot some cows too.” My mother then explained that cows were owned by farmers and you couldn’t go on someone’s land shoot their cows. That you could only shoot wild animals that run around and people don’t own. So my son ponders this for about a second then replied, “Then we’ll have to find some wild cows to shoot.” There is no problem so great that a seven year old boy can’t find a solution. Like I said, brilliant.

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5 thoughts on “Wild Cow Solution

  1. Someone should start a ranch where you can hunt wild cows….because I like steak too and I bet wild cow steak is awesome after a hard day of hunting wild cows.

  2. Wild cows do more than just stand there…which btw is how they fool you. They can moo very aggressively and are quite furtive. You don’t want to be caught out in the open around wild cows without some sort of weapon.

    Just look at these headlines.

    Farmer crushed to death by cow
    http://www.thisislondon.co.uk/news/article-23381611-details/Farmer+crushed+to+death+by+cow/article.do

    Heroic horse saves woman from death by cow
    http://www.horsetalk.co.nz/archives/2007/08/110.shtml

    Dangerous Cows
    http://tierneylab.blogs.nytimes.com/2009/07/31/dangerous-cows/

    The biggest danger is ignoring the truth about wild cows…people need to be informed.

  3. James Estrin/The New York Times

    An Angus beef, left, and dairy cow in Harlemville, N.Y.
    The image of cows as placid, gentle creatures is a city slicker’s fantasy, judging from an article published on Friday by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, which reports that about 20 people a year are killed by cows in the United States. In some cases, the cows actually attack humans—ramming them, knocking them down, goring them, trampling them and kicking them in the head—resulting in fatal injuries to the head and chest.

    Mother cows, like other animals, can be fiercely protective of their young, and dairy bulls, the report notes, are “especially possessive of their herd and occasionally disrupt feeding, cleaning, and milking routines.”

    The article, in the Morbidity and Mortality Weekly Report, discusses 21 cases in which people were killed by cattle from 2003 to 2007 in Iowa, Kansas, Missouri and Nebraska.

    In 16 cases, “the animal was deemed to have purposefully struck the victim,” the report states. In 5 other cases, people were crushed against walls or by gates shoved by the cattle. Ten of the attacks were by bulls, 6 by cows and 5 by “multiple cattle.” A third of the deaths were caused by animals that had been aggressive in the past.

    All but one of the victims died from head or chest injuries; the last died after a cow knocked him down and a syringe in his pocket injected him with an antibiotic meant for the cow. In at least one case the animal attacked from behind, when the person wasn’t looking. Older men with arthritis and hearing aids have the highest risk of being injured by livestock, the report says, probably because they don’t hear the animals charging and can’t move fast enough to get out of the way.

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